A Villager’s Valentine

February 16, 2009 at 5:33 pm | Posted in d8ingame, he-motions, idiots, life, msheflani, poetry | 9 Comments

My DEaR Wa-jee-raw*!

my swit ruv

my swit ruv

I would want to break into your thoughts with what’s written in my heart!
Hey wait, waiiiiiiiiit, let me tone it down as you would when you smear your Kimbo-vasirini* and the layer is too much for your mothiririmos* liking and those soft hands rise over and above your chocolate thighs…
Oh, the sighs that come out unbidden out of my lips when i ritho* you do your rishio*.
Surely, there’ll be no rats to interupt your animated grunts as my rhumbas serenade and refresh your body, soul and mind (in that oda!) like the ka-Novida*drink i brought you from the big city!
Shy girl, shy girl, hear, hear, give me your ears for all these years i’ve wanted to see you draw that map on the red earth with your big toe…for such a market day like this, when your mother and mine rush to sell ndumas* and ikwas*, i’l invite you right into my hut…and what’s more, into my heart!
See, see, Wa-jiro, my rav*…i bought a brand new kanyitera and, tsk tsk, suprise, supriiiiiiiiiiiiiise, a pink lacy one…the kind cool girls in the big city wear!…don’t blush, don’t blush, Wa-jiro, don’t blush, because even as rains have disappointed, i shall stand to appoint you with countless reasons…reminiscent of the days we rolled carefree on the green grass carpet and it’s viridity merged with our childhood innocense….
Hold on, hold on…Wa-jiro…i know you got no humor tumor in your head and i can not be simpler than this…but i can assure you, in Uni-verse-City, they don’t award degrees for virginity!
So, pris, pris, un-insure your thoughts from mindless chastity…
Ok!Ok!OK!My bad!I fixed the bed, i swear i did…that by the time the sun bleeds over Gaichanjiru Village and the mishumaris are loose, i bet the crickets will swallow the creaking with the rhymes of their chymes….
Oh…there comes your nyukwa, i must go!

laughter in that language – i told you!
*Wa-jiro > Wanjiro- the name of a young maiden Kikuyu girl.
Kimbo-Vaserin >Kimbo is a cooking fat brand- folks in the village back in the day applied it as you would Vaseline…vaserin is, yes, Vaseline!
Ritho>eye!..eye-ing you.
Rishio> Ritual, hehe
Ka-Novida > Novida – a refreshing non alcoholic drink from the Schweppes and Cocacola stable…assumed to be ‘up-market, mobile…with-it city folks…
Ndumas & Ikwas > Arrowroots and…Arrowroots…they’re all dug out!
rav >love, lol.
Kanyitera > a smoky lamp made of tin, a wick and paraffin…emits a lot of smoke!
Mshumaris> Nails
Nyukwa> A derogative term to refer to ‘your mother’.

πŸ˜€

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9 Comments »

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  1. You have amused me BoyF….

    Reminds me of those books which used to show people how to write love letters πŸ™‚

    welcome Val..and u seem to have borrowed from some of those, aha!

  2. Eh Bwoy… haven’t u just killed it. If I may, I would like to borrow this for my Valentine’s card next year… I don’t see how I will afford to buy the ones at Hallmark.

  3. Aaaaaww, that is hilariously sweet!

  4. LOL! But what is mothiririmos?

    they are the front part of your mitaris, looool….i mean…the space between your knees and feet…i looked for an English equivalent but wapi!!

  5. too funny…and no they do not award degrees for virginity in college!

  6. a dude you killed it with this one serious skills i like it

  7. boy fulani, how are you!

  8. Boy this was hilarious. I see how you struggled with the word mithirimos when explaining to mama, ati mitaris! You are crazy. That was hilarious!

  9. this one had me on the floor mate. totally inspired!

    lol
    hope u wake in time to work.


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