hornier than thou

April 11, 2008 at 4:09 pm | Posted in life | 5 Comments

Horniness can be bad thing, especially if there is no cure in sight. As in, dehorning you know?
Be it a horny mosquito that’s trying to seduce you for a pint of your blood, it always ugly kwanza ka hau-I-feel.
Yaani, hujiskii na hizo stori.
Ladies understand what am talking with so many horny guys walking around, who-should-know better but don’t.
Hmm…
Much worse, is to have a horny neighbor.
I have many ways of saying this but this guy is downright horny. And Shamelessly so!
He thinks by causing chaos and having his disgruntlement spread to other jiranis, it’s a problem shared, thus a problem halved!
Or how do u explain a neighbor with a fetish for putting on so loud music that you can neither sleep, concentrate and by the second week, you have all his collections by your fingertips…please mind that they are nowhere near your taste.
So much for these equally horny juakalimen. they have made it their biz to make cheap ampli-fires as well as speakers that have more to do with size, quantity rather than quality.
Worse still, is the sound. It is earsplitting, irritating, and blows the living daylights out of the joy of having your own private moments.
Saa, huyu fala anaona amefika./this nitwit or P. Ochieng would call him, nincimpoop sees he has arrived.
I know there is the issue of confrontation but am too civilized for that. Talking to ‘authorities’…is another option that I will attempt not..Especially coz najua I haven’t cleared my rent arrears for the past month.
Furthermore, they have been unable to repair a window pane that broke six months ago yet they appear without fail to collect rent…those unfriendly agents with no non sense looks, wielding a big kifuli, just incase unyete na rent…/’joke with rent’
Lucky for me, juzi, someone showed up at his crib and she closely resemble that thing called a wife.
Like the Kenyan political crisis, calm has returned…albeit ‘uneasy’
Now, I am a haunted dude. Hizi mashida…argggggghh..
Those tunes of akina katitu and incoercible rumba songs clog my sleep and heaven forbid, may that ominous horniness not catch up with me.
I currently have no stereo.
Niliuza.
Nor do I have a wife.
Nilimfukuza.
And I am not horny.
But if am ever is, I will give him what we call kichapo cha mbwa..haha.
From the ‘horse’s mouth …

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5 Comments »

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  1. errmmm..okie..explain to me what “kichapo cha mbwa” is…..

    apart from that (and this is just a question)..pple are horny coz they are playing loud music??ama there is something else I’m getting??

  2. i think u are the horny one, so coz he is playing rumba loudly (and i hate loud unquality music..those cheap speakers..urrgh!), he is hory?

    so now that he has a ‘wife’, u listen to their music? (u know the music am talking about..)

  3. This is a new type of horny. Ama u mean kumea pembe (horns) coz it seems that ur neigbours are long horned and don’t listen to logic.

  4. blow the horn of you’re horny!

  5. frankie, who have you been listening to?


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